Drunken email

Hey Y-. I really wanted to share this with you. We had a joint birthday party tonight: J's, X's, myself, AK's, and even V's, J's twin. We went bowling in B--. it was actually AK's idea, chatting thru instant msg at work. Well I had been thinking to myself earlier how much miss our group. Maybe not enough ppl will show up and we all remember how much smaller our group has gotten. Or perhaps it'll be awkward because we've introduced new sig-o's to make the group a bit larger. (ps - i have a secret... M is dating smbdy =P not sure what status wud be tho).
well to make a long story short, we went bowling in B--and i've taken two shots and perhaps two gin and tonics after that, and we came baack to the residence to chill out, and there are about 7 ppl out in the living room right now, but I wanted to tell you about our cats. i thot you might enjoy hearing about her. I"m sorry I didn't think of this before.
Mango is really shy around ppl! I think we saw some of this already in Chelsea apt, but it was so crowded all the time and honestly, no matter how far away she was/ it still seemed like it was really close by. But when we moved the new residence, the space was much bigger. And suddenly i was sharing a room with X so she wudn't get to sleep with me in my room. i know she missed that so much and i feel so bad that it happened. I think she felt slightly abandoned.
I tried to make up for it by getting her a companion. I thot, maybe if she had another cat to keep her company, she wudn't miss me so much. So I got trotsky. He is a blue russian, as i think i may have mentioned to you before. He is quite... retarded. are you laughing? (cuz i promise i'm not exaggerating). Trotsky has an insatiable appetite for attn. M told me once when she was babysitting him (aka stopping by to make sure they had proper food, litter was clean, etc, while we went on vacation ) that he had obviously been really hungry cuz his bowl was empty, but when she filled it up, he tried to be petted first before eating from the bowl. hehe.
Anyway. he doesn't quite know how a few skillzzzz that I now appreciate so much more from Mango. Dear Yichen. Mango spoiled us.
Trotsky is not successful at learning how to climb across smby's lap without scratching them through their pants / jeans!
Trotsky is not successful at learning his place in mango's playground. When I try to pet Mango, he butts her out of the way or in general tries to get there first. So mango just jumps away and leaves and i don't get to pet her =/
But that means that Mango has come to distrust me in some way. She maybe thinks that Trotsky is proof I don't love her as much. Or maybe she thinks that since she's not in my room anymore, I may have forgotten her in some way. I wish she cud speak English, bc then I wud tell her how stressful my job has been, or how tired I am when I come home. I cudn't deal with Trotsky in the living room. but i cudn't let mango into the bedroom bc trotksy wud really feel discriminated against and i wud hear his pitiful cries outside while Mango was hanging out inside. So basically i felt like a horrible person :( it was a lose-lose situation
Tonight 7 ppl were outside in the living room and trotsky was seeking attn as usual, very curious kitten, soo social, but ill-mannered without realizing. and mango is at the corner of the room furthest from where the crowd is, or hiding in the safest place she can think of: the space btwn a chair seat that is tucked in under a table / and the underside of the table.
I realized she was prob lonely, so I left the gathering and stole away into the kitchen with her. she felt safe with me and purred immediately. everyone else was "out there" while we were "in here". i spent a long time with her, petting her, talking to her with the sound of my voice and the luxurious massage i was giving her, to let her know how much i still loved her. i did not forget her. i realized at that very moment, actually, how much i loved her.
I dont know if you heard from J or Sh that i was thinking of getting rid of the cats. i just felt so burdened by the responsibility of two other lives other than my own. i was so tired all the time. i had no energy for them. i wud go straight to my room after work, and try to de-stress for the next day.
but in the kitchen, is was like old times again. we stayed like that for a long time. then i tried to lead her gently into the living room. She needed to trust me first before she wud trust a living room full of ppl she didnt' recognize or trust. she came slowly outside with me, but stopped just short of walking into the circle of couch/sofa/chairs.
anyway, i love mango. i think i only realized how much i loved her tonight tho.